We learned today that we would have no insurance coverage of any costs related to the clinical trial drug. I have no idea what the costs would be for administration of the drug. My sense is that we’d be able to find a way to cover those costs ourselves. But, that’s not the only obstacle.

A more significant and larger concern about this lack of coverage is that any complications that could arise would also have no coverage. If Lee had a severe reaction that required hospitalization, we’d be on our own. That was enough for us to seriously reconsider what we should do.

We prayed for wisdom about whether to proceed. Shortly after that prayer, Lee mentioned that she really didn’t have a sense of peace about continuing with the trial. Therefore, we’ve decided that the door has been closed.

We’ll be back with Dr. Young tomorrow to begin with his next recommendation. We are looking forward to starting something that’s more of a known entity than something experimental.

There’s also another type of treatment we learned about from a friend who’s going through a similar journey with his wife. It’s called Selective Internal Radiation Therapy and it provides a means of delivering radiation directly to the tumors in Lee’s liver. General radiation is not an option because it causes too much damage to an organ like the liver. So this option is something we’re interested in, and will learn more about next week when we go to a hospital Denver where this treatment is being done.

The results of the CT scan Lee had last Friday are still unknown to us. We may hear later today if anything new will have been revealed. A concern (read fear) we have is that the cancer has continued to grow. Lee began experiencing a lot of pain last week. Pain medication has done a fair job of keeping it manageable.

I wish I had something more uplifting to share with you all. It feels a bit scary to be declining something that was pitched as an option to gain control over the cancer. Faith is tremendously meaningful. Knowing that God is sovereign and that He is completely in control provides comfort. But, the “The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe” continues to echo in my head: God is good, but He’s not safe.

Thank for your continued prayers, calls, e-mails, cards, gifts and visits. We’ve been truly blessed to see the “church” at work.